Introduction to the broken soul: Mark’s story

Preparing for the broken soul ministry Part 1

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For a printable brochure about the broken soul ministry, click here.

Have you ever felt that something inside was broken?  Or that part of you wanted one thing and part wanted the opposite? Have you ever felt that your prayers of confession and surrender would only go so far, and then they either hit a wall or ran into something that fought against them?  Have you ever felt disconnected from what you were doing or felt like you were watching yourself talk?

It can be hard to explain what it feels like to have a broken soul.  No one description fits everyone.  Maybe an example will help.  So here is my story – my first memory that I know for certain was my own broken soul in action: I was in my mid-20s and was part of the leadership team for a young married’s Sunday school class.  A friend and co-leader, one of the finest people I’ve ever known, and I decided to meet for breakfast once a week for accountability.  I noticed a pattern in my conversations with him that I knew wasn’t healthy, but it seemed to just happen without warning.  Each week I found myself saying things to him that put him down.  They were usually just smart-alack comments. Nevertheless, they were cutting and they stung. Soon, I could see that this was wearing on him so I offered, in a friendly and understanding way, to stop meeting with him.  The next week he took me up on the offer.  He did not want to meet anymore.  Suddenly, like a switch had flipped, I began to chew him out for wanting to stop meeting.  The things that I said were wrong, untrue, hypocritical, and went back on the very things I had said a week earlier!  This wasn’t me!  Yet it was, all at the same time.  Inside, I felt exactly like what Paul described in Romans 7:17, “it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me.” While I was doing this, I still remember thinking to myself, “Why am I saying these things?  I know this is wrong.”  It didn’t even feel as if I was the one saying them.  The words were coming out of my mouth and I was allowing them to be said, yet it was as if I was watching the conversation happen at the same time.  Looking back, I now recognize that pattern of speech as the kind of destructive, maniacal conversation that is a reliable sign of an enemy stronghold.  It was as if the enemy was feeding me words that were assured of destroying our friendship, and I was allowing it to happen.  Sadly, it worked.  From then on we were little more than acquaintances.  This man was truly one of the nicest, most intelligent, friendly, level-headed people I’ve ever met.  At that time in my life, he was possibly the finest friend that I had, and he is someone whose friendship I would have valued as I have grown older.  But by the time I was done, the friendship was spoiled.  Not long after that I moved to another state and we lost touch.  Unfortunately, my brokenness continued to act out, causing damage in nearly every area of my life. It took about 15 years before I gained any understanding of what was happening.  During a particularly difficult time, another friend told me about a man named Joe Allbright.  I had been through a wonderful three-day deliverance ministry that had changed my life, but my worst struggles continued.  So I called Joe and told him about my situation.  His response was, “I can help, but you have to read my book.  You see,” he explained, “others deal with what is seen. I deal with what is unseen.  And you must read my book before you will be ready to work with me.” I didn’t have a clue what he meant.  But he sent me his book, Liberating the Bruised, and soon I felt that I was reading my life story.  This man described every aspect of how I felt, where I had struggled, and the dynamics in my marriage and my family.  For the first time in my life, I felt that I understood what was inside of me.  Joe explained what was driving me to places that I didn’t want to go and into behaviors that I didn’t want in myself.  He explained what it means to have a broken soul.  It was different from anything I had ever heard.  (To this day, I still haven’t read or met anyone who matches Joe’s knowledge of the broken soul or his methods of healing it.) To make a long story short, by the time Joe was finished working with me, I hadn’t just been counseled; I had been healed.  For the first time in my life, my mind was quiet.  I was at peace.  I didn’t feel any unfriendly pressure or thoughts hassling me.  It was as if I were standing in the middle of the Houston Astrodome with no one else there, no lights, no power, nothing – only silence.  I remember thinking that this must be how “normal” people feel.  Thankfully, this peace wasn’t temporary.  I had received a miraculous and thorough healing.  The destructive emotions and upheavals that I had experienced for my entire life were gone.  I could think of situations that had always brought up pain or anxiety, and now there was only peace.  This began the most amazing and wonderful journey that I have ever been on.  I grew into a relationship with the Lord containing peace and intimacy that I never knew was possible.   Now to be honest, I still made mistakes, had plenty to learn, and over time, had some more healing to do.  But I was no longer fighting an unwinnable internal war.   I had self-control, better understanding, peace, and the ability to actually correct things that I needed to do differently. Over the long run, the Lord used Theophostic Prayer Ministry to pave the way for some additional blessings that were nearly as powerful as the healing I had received through Joe.  But in my case, nothing ever matched the healing and the blessing that I received from God mending my broken soul. So exactly what happened in my story above?  A separate part of me, literally another personality, took over.  You have probably heard of it by other names – names that do not aptly describe this very powerful and elusive form of spiritual oppression – names like Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), or Multiple Personality Disorder.  Those names, and the secular understanding that goes with them, do not do justice to this problem.  As evidence, I will offer you this:  It takes a traditional counselor, psychiatrist, or psychologist (Christian or non-Christian) an average of seven to ten years to heal a typical case of DID.  The ministry God gave through Joe Allbright will accomplish the same thing, only do a better job, in two to three days. Once you understand DID from God’s perspective, there is a clear blueprint of the cause, the complications, and a cure that the secular world will probably never understand.  At least 2/3 of the issues you deal with in healing DID God’s way can only be rightly understood only through Christian teaching and be done only because of the cross. The broken soul is near and dear to God’s heart, so much so that it is one of the first things Jesus addressed when he announced his ministry:

“The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted …” Isaiah 61:1 (NIV)

God clearly acknowledges the broken soul in Scripture.  If God acknowledges it, you can be sure he has a plan to heal it.  In the next set of articles, beginning with What does the Bible say about the broken soul?, we will visit Scriptures that describe this condition and show what he wants to do about it.  Then, we will unfold in detail what it is, where it comes from, how it can affect us, and how it is healed. Next article